Saturday, January 17, 2015

Trust and Listen

It's a new year, and lots happened in 2014 - some hard, some exciting, some just plain new! I sense an exciting year of wonderful things to come! Last year, the words that were a theme for me were Grace and Acceptance, and while I think those are still things I strive for - in particular, grace and acceptance for myself and for others - I've grown a lot in those areas. This year, I felt God telling me to Listen and to Trust. Maybe these were actions I leaned on a lot at the end of 2014, but in doing so, I was blessed so much! I took risks like transferring to a new job that could only guarantee me 3 days a week when I was working 4 (and now have been on average working 4 - 5 days a week), accepting a nomination to be on a committee that takes me to Ottawa a few times a year, meeting new people, and beginning to connect on a deeper level with some people in my life to name a few. I have seen the power of listening to God's prompting and then trusting that there is a reason and that it may even be a really good thing for me and those I meet in the new situations So, in going forward in 2015, I get the sense God wants me to listen ad trust Him in taking the risks He is calling me to. That these risks - whatever they might be - are part of his bigger plan. Maybe they will be small. And maybe they will seem insignificant to many of those around me. In reality, I think we all take little risks - and when we don't, we become stale. Stuck in a rut. This year, I don't feel like I'm entering the year in a rut and I like that.

It really was a huge deal for me to quit the job that was stable, consistent, paid my bills, and safe - to work in an environment that most people fear and question why I'd want to do that kind of work. Yet it's rewarding. Sometimes it's sad. Sometimes my heart just goes out to my clients and I hurt for them - for the fact they fear re-engaging with society and that they fear getting ill again and doing the same things they did in the past. It's hard to see them back in the hospital again when it happens. And it's a joy to see them take small (and bigger) risks and be successful! I don't think I cared as much when I worked at the hospital. Now, I see these people regularly. I coach them. I teach them. I listen. And they are not just some patient that comes back over and over where all I get to do is assess and make recommendations. I still do some of that, but even those are more involved. I think I knew I needed to move on when I had the opportunities to really connect with patients and see them through thick and thin and when I knew this was a rarity - something that really usually isn't part of working in a hospital.

The other changes in my life - new people, getting back into doing music, new experiences, new professional aquaintances and roles (outside of my job) - it's exciting. I feel excited about my future. It's been a while since I've been excited about my future. I think I allowed myself to get in a rut and I don't want that to happen for a while. Like the quote on my blog main page goes, "Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches, letting us stretch and grow to new heights. ~ Pauline R. Kezer

Another quote I came across, although I don't know who said it - "Go out on a limb. That's where the fruit is".  Going out on a limb can be scary. It waves around and is not always stable and most certainly is risky. But the reward comes with being vulnerable and putting yourself out there where you might get hurt or turned on your backside. But if you get the reward ... yummy! Haha. :D

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